Cache of Words

Our little girl is having a sleep crisis and I need HELP.

She used to have a pretty good routine. We'd give her a bottle before bed and she'd practically fall asleep in our arms. We'd hold her for a few minutes, try to get any air out of her belly and then lay her in bed. She'd stay asleep with no trouble. Occasionally, she'd wake in the middle of the night but the pacifier usually worked.

Lately, she's falling asleep in our arms and awake the moment we set her in her crib. And she screams. Then she'll wake up in the middle of the night screaming. Half the time she wants to get down and play. Or she falls asleep in our arms and again wakes up when we put her down.

So, I did some research and read about the "Cry It Out" method. We started doing that two nights ago. Eventually she'll fall asleep, but then wakes up twenty minutes later screaming again and I don't know what to do. Do I check on her? Try to comfort her? Making any sort of contact with her seems to make the screaming even worse, like she's yelling at me for leaving her alone for so long. And if it's the middle of the night, she's waking Son up, who has to get up for school in the morning. So then I'm trying to do damage control by picking her up and taking her to our room.

Anyone else experienced anything like this? What did you do to help the baby sleep better? Mr. Jen and I are exhausted and frustrated!

Made it to the coffee shop! But the Internet is now distracting me. Must get to work!

This Wednesday is a bank holiday, so I used my last two vacation days and took off Monday and Tuesday as well. No work till Thursday! My husband has class tomorrow, and my mom usually watches the baby while he's there. Being the awesome mother that she is, she offered to keep the schedule, despite my vacation. You know what that means?

Two free hours ALL TO MYSELF!!!

I'm packing up the laptop and heading down to the coffee shop. I'm this close to finishing BIRD and I think a couple of hours in a new environment might motivate the muse. Or at least I'm hoping. This is by far the longest book I've ever written. It's currently at 59,400 words. I was shooting for 45,000. I'm not sure what happened. It still needs a ton of work, because several things changed, but at least I'll have the bones down. I think I'd like to be able to start submitting in the new year.

BUT, despite being almost finished with BIRD, I am feeling a little self-conscious when it comes to writing in general. Lately, I've been wondering if writing is what I'm meant to do. Like what if I was put on this planet to do something else? And I'm just wasting my time? Spinning my wheels? Sometimes, I picture myself under deadline and hating it. And then having revisions and feeling like I just want to curl up in bed with a book and forget the manuscript ever happened. Like, if I hate half the process, then why am I even writing? I really don't know. It hasn't been fun for a while, not since I found out I was pregnant. Possession is the last book I really remember loving.

But if I don't have writing, then what do I have? I don't want to work in a bank for the rest of my life.

*sigh* Why does life have to be so confusing?

jennifer_d_gand I were having a conversation about crafting and selling on Etsy, and we talked about the art I made for my Baby Girl's room. I cut out two tear drop birds from scrapbooking paper and hand-sewed them onto white paper. I was pretty happy with how they turned out (though not as happy with my husband's hanging abilities, they are SOO not straight!) and Jennifer asked if I could post a picture.

So here's one of the framed pieces. The other is identical to this one, except it's opposite, so that the birdies face each other.

Anyone have a shop on Etsy? Have you been able to sell well? Have you enjoyed being a seller?

Oh alliteration, how you tempt me.

In an effort to jump start my creativity, I've decided to do some writing exercises, starting with writing prompts. I found this one online---

You return home from work to find a Dear John letter on your kitchen table. Oddly enough, it's from one of your kitchen appliances. What does the letter say?

 

Dear Jennifer,

 

The milk is going bad. The plums you bought have gone to mush and the carrots are completely dried out. You could use them as swords, I think, should someone break into your house and you find yourself needing protection.

 

Oddly enough, you can’t keep the Arbor Mist Blackberry Merlot in the fridge longer than three days and you go through more soda than a team of little leaguers.

 

What is wrong with this picture? I don’t need an answer to that question. Just look at your butt.

 

With warm regards,

 

Your Refrigerator

Join in the fun, fellow writers!

I was browsing through the book lists on Amazon.com and I noticed just how few contemporary books were out there. When you start looking at the "most popular" lists and the "new and upcoming" lists like 95% of them are fantasy/paranormal. 

I remember two or so years ago when chic-lit was popular and publishers were putting out a ton of chic-litty books geared toward girls---books in the same vein as American Girl magazine. Those books have all but vanished, replaced almost entirely by paranormals. And I'm not complaining, because I LOVE paranormals, but it makes me wonder what will be the next trend. It's gone from cute, contemporary fiction to edgy contemporary fiction (like Gossip Girl) to dark, gritty paranormal. And looking at Publishers Marketplace, and the popularity of The Hunger Games, I have to wonder if the next trend will be something along the lines of smart, gritty sci-fi/dystopian books.

Of course, as we all know, something can sell no matter the selling market if the book is Just That Good. Still, it's fun watching the market and trying to predict what will be popular. I'm pinning my bets on sci-fi/dystopian, and if it's done half as good as The Hunger Games, I can't wait to watch it play out. 

(But I do hope vampires come back some day! My first book was about vampires.) 



 

Everyone keeps telling me I should be very afraid of having a daughter. That one day, she will turn into a teenager and all hell will break loose.

One dad said, "The teenage years with a daughter have been borderline painful."

A mother said, "I have a son and a daughter. Guess which one terrifies me the most?"

So, fellow mothers out there, should I be scared? Because I sorta am.

How many of you use LJ less now that Facebook and Twitter are so popular? I'm addicted to Facebook, though I use it mostly to stay in touch with friends and family and really don't use it for my writing life. I do have a Twitter account, but I hardly ever use it and maybe that's because I'm not comfortable with it yet. I haven't taken the time to get to know the site that well.

For those of you who do Twitter on a regular basis, do you love it more than LJ now? I'm still a little skeptical.

Clue me in!

I used to hate present tense in books. If I picked up a book and read the first page and realized it was in present tense, I'd almost always put it back on the shelf. But now...I really don't notice it anymore. It seems a bit more common of late and The Hunger Games/Catching Fire were done really well in present tense.

Still, I've always written in past tense, never experimenting with present tense. Bird's 42,000 words are in past tense. But then, last night, I wrote six new pages on Bird and when I finished up for the night, I realized the last two pages I'd written were in present tense. And oddly enough I liked it. But I already had 42,000 words in past tense! So I started changing the two pages back and it just wouldn't go. Like, I couldn't change it to past tense in my head, because it didn't want to be past tense.

Now I don't know what to do. Does the story want to be present tense? Or was I influenced by what I'd been reading that day? Maybe my reading bleed into my writing.

I figure I'll pick up again where I left off and see what comes out. If it's present tense, then...well..I have a lot more work ahead of me.

It's hard to write when you have a new baby. The good thing is, when I have time, I am actually writing, as opposed to staring at a blank screen, like I had been for the last year. Bird is at 38,000 words and I've added nearly 18,000 of those in about two months' time. That's good! I'm starting to get that itch though, like I want it done RIGHT THIS MINUTE. I must take my time, because I feel like rushing has gotten me into trouble in the past. And this book is working out well so far, plot wise.

And while it may be hard to write when the baby is awake, reading is possible, so I've been doing a lot of that lately. I just finished The Hunger Games today. Wow. I heard so many people talking about it and I wondered what all the fuss was about. Now I know. I checked it out from the library two weeks ago and thought on Thursday, since it was overdo, that I might want to get going on that. So I started reading Thursday and haven't stopped since! It was a good book and I'm really glad I waited this long, because the next book is out next week! Which means no excessive amount of waiting and pining.

Other books I've read lately: The Demon's Lexicon and Along for the Ride. Both were good books. I have Dreamfever (by Karen Marie Moning) on order, and I'm hoping it'll show tomorrow or Tuesday. I cannot wait to read that one.

And tonight is True Blood night! I hope I get to see more of Eric in this episode. I have been pining for him.

I think I am in love with Eric Northman (of True Blood). Possibly more so than Dean (of Supernatural).

Anyone else watching True Blood? I haven't read the books, but I'm wondering if I should start!

I'm actually writing tonight! And it's working! :)

The last bit that made it on the page:

Tram grasped my hand, coaxing me inside. An unfamiliar tingling sensation ran from my fingers right up my arm, then down my spine, like pleasure had turned corporeal, and it was traveling the road of my bones.

I don't know why, but I really-really like that excerpt. Yeah for progress!

In an effort to lose some baby weight, we've been walking a lot lately. We usually go down to the beach, because it's always nice and there's good sidewalks for the stroller. Since I haven't posted as much lately, I thought I'd use pictures to show my LJ friends what we've been up to.

This is the breakwall leading out to the lighthouse. In the summertime, people walk it for exercise, fishing, and to watch the carferry go out at 8:00.

 

( More pics under the cut.  )

 

Oh my gosh, it has been a bazillion years since I last posted! I was just telling my aunt-in-law, another writer, how I feel like I've really pulled away from the online writing community, what with the new baby and working, etc. I miss everyone! But what little free time I have lately, has been going to writing (and dishes and laundry).

Maybe someday I'll be present online again, like I was a year or so ago. I think my main goal right now is actually finishing a project and getting it ready to submit, because I haven't finished anything new since Possession. I'm at 30,000 on Bird, but I keep pulling away from that project, thinking it's no good. I have to remind myself that I'm in the middle, and this always happens in the middle, so keep writing! Because starting a new project would take twice as long to finish.

So anyway, back to work! I miss you guys!

I have to go back to work tomorrow after having three months off for my maternity leave. I'm so sad! I really don't want to go. I'm going to miss my baby girl! I know moms all over the world have to do this, but it doesn't  make me feel better because there are also moms all over the world who get to stay home. I want to be one of those moms! I sorta wish Mr. Jen and I hadn't started our life backwards. We bought a house, got married, and had kids BEFORE he finished school. Maybe if he had his degree, and a career, I'd be a stay-at-home momma right now. *sigh* You do what you have to do, I guess!

If I had known just two Oreos amounted to 140 calories and 7 grams of fat, I certainly wouldn't have consumed 8 over a 24-hour period. That's like a Big Mac. In eight tiny cookies! It should be required that they put a warning on the front of the package that says, Which would you rather go ape crazy on? Eight Oreos or a Big Mac? Because I totally would have gone with the Big Mac.

 

Having a baby girl changes everything. Even my dryer lint. It is now pink instead of various shades of gray and blue.

I just love her. She makes everything seem shiny and fun and pink.

I recently switched to a new dentist who came highly recommended. I liked my old dentist, but he was such a popular pick in town that it was nearly impossible to get in to see him. Like, when I had a wisdom tooth that was giving me a massive headache, when I called to schedule an appointment they told me the soonest I could get in was in two weeks. WHAT! A toothache will not wait two weeks!

Anyway, I went to see Dr. R, the new doctor, to get a cavity filled and the dental assistant says, "Would you like the gas today?"

I'm like, "Um...I didn't know that was an option."

(Previous dentist didn't even offer me gas when they CUT OUT my wisdom tooth. I mean, geez!)

So I take the offer and the assistant hooks me up to the gas. And pretty soon, I don't even realize I'm getting a cavity filled, what with the party going on inside my head. There was dancing, and hand holding and REO Speedwagon playing in the background. It was the best dentist appointment I've ever had. I'm like, "Sign me up for my next appointment!"

I cannot tell you how nice it was to get dental work done and not be so freaked out about it through the entire session. Seriously, every dentist should offer you gas the minute you walk in the door. The world might have better teeth! (Once we all get dental insurance, that is.)

I live in a relatively small town of about 9,000 people, so when one of them wins $700,000 on a state lottery it's a big deal. There was a message on the digital sign outside the gas station here in town that said, "Check your Lucky 7's ticket. We sold a $700,000 winner." I really wished I had a Lucky 7's lottery ticket to check!

The woman who won works at the hospital here in town. She's like anyone else here. She gets by, but she's not rich. The story is just amazing. After turning in the ticket, she left with a check for $494,000. Can you imagine? Of course, me and Mr. Jen couldn't help but imagine what it would be like to win $494,000. Pay off the house. Buy new cars. Buy new laptops! But I think the most valuable thing money does is give you more time to spend with your family. If you have that much money, you don't have to work. At least for a couple of years. And as I pictured this, all these days spread out before me...seeing my little girl walk, feeding her smushed peas and seeing the look on her face when she tastes it...that much money can buy you time you wouldn't otherwise have. Sure, I can feed my little girl peas after I get home from work and I'll still get joy out of watching her learn to walk, but it's just not the same as spending everyday with her. I don't know how I'm going to go from being with her all day long to being with her from 5:30 to 9:30 till she goes to bed.

Maybe I need to buy a lottery ticket...